Gifts

Packaging: In general, consumerism can and will add to a perpetual waste cycle. However, this does not negate our desire to gift our friends and family with thoughtful items intended to bring joy. Luckily, we have our zero waste holiday guide to help lead the way. If you’re purchasing gifts this year, consider eco-friendly wrapping and packaging. You can:

• Wrap gifts in fabric. Fabric you find at a bulk store, cut up old sweaters or even purchase textures you love like cotton or wool second hand.
• 100% Post Consumer Recycled Brown Craft Paper. This paper is wonderfully made from paper that’s already lived it’s first life and it isn’t bleached! You can find this at a local craft store or on Amazon.
• Real ribbons and bows. Yes, use real ribbons and bows. What do I mean by this? Tying up our gifts with biodegradable materials like cotton, linen, and even velvet that’s been ethically created without polyester or upcycled from used plasic, is the best choice to make this holiday season. Plasticy choices like the shiny bows you find in the dollar store are not healthy for our planet. Pro tip: purchase a velvet dress second hand from a local thrift store to cut into ribbon strips.
• Eco-friendly gift tape: There is such a thing! Most tapes are biodegradable, however, tapes like Scotch’s Magic Eco Tape is created from 75% post consumer recycled materials with a water soluble adhesive.

Ordering

As conscious consumers our minds wander to the impact our gift deliveries and purchases have on our communities and Earth. Some practical tips for the holiday season:

• Order local & Order small. I mean, order from your local small business crafter. There are some seriously talented folks around us! Instagram is a great way to find talent in your area through hashtags like #vermontmade and more. When you order from makers near you, you support a family in your community and cut back on delivery emissions.
• Order all at once. Hey, I am no pure Earth warrior here. I am doing my best to support local makers, our community, and the planet but I am still a busy mama and entrepreneur. I feel the magnetic vibes of convenience Amazon offers to women like me, and I too need to take advantage of Cyber Monday for the sake of sanity and sometimes budget. If you’re going to press the “order now” button, make sure you order all at once. Amazon and most other online stores offer delivering your products all at once. This significantly cuts back on emissions. So put it all in your cart, choose deliver together, and be done with it. Multiple small orders causes a lot of running around for those shippers and a lot of unnecessary CO2 for Mama Earth.
• Gift Cards. I said it, gift cards. We have a stigma surrounding gift cards, and it needs to be eradicated. Gift cards are often seen as a cop out for lack of thought, but truthfully, they’re the gift of giving exactly what a person wants. Let’s be honest, the Christmas return game is real, ya’ll. The consumer industry sees as much activity in gift exchanges after the holiday as it does prior to the holiday, and that hustle and bustle of returns is no good for the planet. If the gift even gets returned, sometimes, it’s thrown out. Yes, Auntie Sue, your cutsie hot coca mug packaged in an insane amount of plastic molding and cardboard is tossed aside after the glimmering non-recycable paper is torn off. Instead, opt for a $10 MasterCard gift card. If wrapping gifts feels special to you, then pop that gift card into a old shoebox and wrap away my friend.

Decor

I’ll be the first to tell you I am not getting a fake tree, a real Balsam Fir will be in my home every year. However, we don’t have to forgo all traditional decorating to help out Mama Earth. Here’s how:

• Glass, wood and otherwise natural fibers. Avoid plastic ornaments or garland for your tree. Look for wood carvings, glass blown ornaments, hand painted pottery, cotton yarn creations, or linen sewn figures to adorn your tree. I had a ton of fun crafting a beautiful garland from material scraps for our tree two years ago. No plastic tinsel here!
• LED Lights. Less energy used, the better. For the outdoors, consider solar charged LED lights to decorate your porches and more.
• Purchase second hand. Although I am a designer, I have a hard time splurging on things like decor for our home. If it doesn’t have a sense of utilitarian functionality, I am more apt to do without than to bring it home. Purchasing Christmas decor from yard sales, thrift stores, and upcycled crafts from makers has made it easier for me to decorate for the holidays and it’s great for our planet.

There’s a lot we could do to achieve a green holiday, a sustainable Christmas, or a zero waste holiday but these are my most practical tips for you. Incorporating all, or even just one, of these practices will help you feel good about the impact you’re having on Mama Earth this Christmas. I could go on, but for me, these are the most helpful zero waste holiday guide tips possible. Have more sustainable ideas for the holiday? Share with me on Instagram! I would love to hear from you there, or connect with me here.

xo

Kayce Mae

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A wedding with the intention of celebrating true love with only their closest friends and family.

The Couple

Mallory and Bradley are the kind of people you would be eternally grateful to have in your life. I was particularly blessed in 2019 to have had some amazing couples to befriend, and these two were certainly in that group of amazing folks to work alongside. In all seriousness, it was an emotional post-wedding goodbye with these beautiful people. Mallory and Bradley are fun, spunky, and always down for a good time. Their sense of adventure and roll with the punches attitudes could only stem from the many experiences they’ve shared together over the years, from moving from city to city to exploring London, England while Mallory interned, this couple has no shortage of resiliency or unending love.

The Ceremony

The ceremony took place atop Stratton Mountain. Stunning panoramic views of the Vermont mountains encompassed the couple as the nuptials took place, surrounded by seventy of their closest friends and family. Many of their guests had never seen mountains or the beauty of Vermont as Summer blends into Fall, and yet, even the gorgeous Vermont backdrop couldn’t compete with the awe inspiring true love these two illustrated that fateful day. The groom took it upon himself to build his bride a trendy hexagonal arch; a true labor of love. Floral swags decorated the arch, which were skillfully created by the magnificent Cedar Circle Farms.

Reception

This Vermont wedding reception took place at a nearby farmhouse, set beneath the night sky and glowing cafe lights. Design aesthetic for this wedding was reflective of the bride’s affinity for dramatic flair with touches of gold. I had the honor of designing the floral installations for Mallory, choosing dark reds, wild textures and bold stems.

The Rain

The last candle was lit, the tables were set, the flowers were arranged, and we had five minutes to go before the first bus of guests were due to to arrive when the skies opened up into a torrential downpour. Ushering guests into the farmhouse for an impromptu indoor cocktail hour, the team and I collected every towel imaginable. I rescued the custom guest book the bride had designed and the instant Kodak camera’s, while the caterer rushed to move cheese plates and charcuterie inside. We waited out this brief storm and as reward for our patience, were greeted by a happy rainbow. The subsequent forty five minutes were dedicated to drying off every piece of gold flatware, plates, tables, benches, dance floor – you name it – before the newly wed couple arrived. We replaced every single candle, lit them all again, and reassured the couple there was no need to worry. Our vendor team were phenomenal in both their flexibility and perseverance. In the end, the couple received the wedding under the night sky they had always dreamed of. It was an honor to be a part of their lives for this intimate and celebratory chapter!

Vendors

This beautiful day was brought together by an incredible vendor team, most notably:

Photography: Rove Wild Photography

Videography: D White Visuals

Cocktail hour music: Ida Mae Specker

DJ: Joe Bell

Photography by Rove Wild Photography.

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A wedding reflective of their love for the land with the intention of being the best day of their lives.

On Saturday, September 28th 2019 the wedding of Jewels and Scott took place on family property in Jericho, Vermont. Every detail of the ceremony and reception was symbolic. Set with giant sail masts, bouncy houses and even dinosaur costumes – read on to see how we crafted the best day of their lives.

The Couple

The groom, Scott, is a passionate mountain biker and outdoor enthusiast. Scott has the distinct joy of working within the mountain bike industry and travels all over the globe. Scott may traverse the worlds best mountain bike trails often, but he never forgets to pack his sense of humor. The bride, Julianne or Jewels as we fondly call her, is a lawyer working in the boroughs of New York City and Connecticut with a love for good wine, cheese, and her pup Murray. Together, Jewels and Scott shred fresh trails, are self proclaimed foodies and partake in silly shenanigans from time to time (or all the time).

Planning

I had the pleasure of working alongside Jewels closely for the last year to plan their wedding. Within that year, I met both sets of parents, heard countless stories, FaceTimed at all hours of the night, witnessed job changes and dreamed about the future with Jewels. Sometimes, I even swooped in to manage the little things (and always the most overwhelming). Once, I created, printed, and shipped all of the invitation address labels when the couple became bombarded by work. Another time, I drove for over an hour to meet the bride’s parents for breakfast and answer their questions. At one point, I wrangled a last minute ice cream truck. I was honored to be a listening ear as devastating family news occurred. Personally, I found solace in planning the details of this wedding. Chatting with Julie was something to look forward to, knowing there would be many tangents in between vendor discussions and timelines. In the end, Jewels and I decided we are long lost sisters. I came into this a wedding planner, and will leave as an adopted member of the family.

Ceremony

Jewels wanted a wedding that balanced her Italian family traditions and their passions, all while being simply fun. We wanted to strike the perfect combination of meaning and silliness that brings great joy. It was my mission to create a ceremony space that accomplished meaningful elegance and reflected the spunk these two brought to the table. Beginning with the significant details, we hung giant sailboat masts above the ceremony space. These masts belonged to the groom’s grandfather, who built his sailboat and took it around the world. Now we know where Scott’s travel bug comes from, it’s clearly genetic. These sails honored the grandfather who could not be with us at the ceremony and created an intimate space in the grand apple orchard the nuptials took place in. The bride, who practices yoga, found these incredibly colorful wool yoga blankets to cover the hay bale seating. Later, we will donate these wool blankets to animal shelters in need. The arch was handcrafted by groom, derived from fell white birch found on the family property.

Lorzenzosaur

Last but not least, is Lorenzo, the ring bearer. Jewels asked her sweet nephew if he would be dressing up for the wedding. Lorenzo said, “Yes I will be a dinosaur.” Thus, setting a theme of dinosaur dress up through the entire wedding day.

Reception

A clear top aztec tent was used to allow the stunning property views to shine until sundown.

Tables

The tablescapes were designed with the couple’s love for the family land in mind. Real reindeer moss was hand sorted to create these lush runners, paired with a variety of votives filled with water and floating candles. Set alongside these candles stood the bride’s father’s own wine bottle. Custom labels congratulating Scott and Jewels were created for the wine bottles. Each wine bottle hosted a pair of soft white roses. We chose marbled salad plates, pewter gray napkins and hammered copper cutlery. I chose to fold the napkins in a twisted tie. As a designer, I am looking for each detail to fully engage in the vision I’ve crafted with my clients. The twisted tie styled napkins was a fun way to break the plane, create a dynamic setting, and it perfectly embodied the less serious side the couple strived for. Jewels and I felt the combination represented her Italian roots well. The entire tablescape served as the elegant element of the reception.

Lights

Above, we strung cafe style solar lights. These beauties created a soft glow, automatically turning on as the sun set.

Custom Head Table

A custom designed backdrop was created for the couple by myself and my mother in law, Robina. We hand dyed the back drop material to match the reindeer moss table runners. I hand strung the dahlias, sun flowers and zinnias the groom’s father grew on the property to create the floral garlands. We then utilized the bulk order of organic locally grown flowers from Cedar Circle Farm to achieve the wild, natural and earthy drapery above. I decided to make the head, sweetheart table burst with color for Julie to suit her quirky and wonderful personality. Robina carefully put together each vase in front of the table. Without Julie’s inspiration, and Robina’s decades of theatre design, I am sure I could not have brought this vision to life alone.

Not pictured here, is the beautiful anti-pasta table Jewel’s father created for cocktail hour. The table boasted of hand rolled mozzerella, pancetta, and fresh bread. Outside the tent stood a giant inflatable obstacle course, jousting ring, photo booth, movie theatre popcorn and a cotton candy machine. Check out the Instagram highlights reel to see the groom battle it out in the jousting ring! Maid of Honor and Best Man even made their entrance to dinner hour faux battling. Our carnival style cocktail hour was exactly what the bride wanted to bring forth the “Best day of their lives” feeling.

Ending the Night

Dinner was served by the incredible Farmers & Foragers, who went above and beyond the call of duty. I highly recommend them! First dances were done, and speeches were made. An Ice Cream truck showed up. We lit up the dance floor. For the second time at this wedding, tyrannosaurus-rexes made their appearance. Guests donned costumes, including a pinata costume who flung candy all over the dance floor. It was the ultimate combination of simplistic elegance and downright real fun.

Special Thank You

I owe a special thank you to this group of volunteers. The night before the wedding, I spent an unexpected six hours in the Emergency Room. Once I was safely discharged from the ER, I went straight to wedding prep. Friends and Family of Scott and Julie worked tirelessly alongside us to make this wedding happen.

Tyler and Francesca, thank you for all of the work you did to set the tables and hang lights. I appreciate you immensely.

Alice, Scott’s sister, thank you for your assistance with the ceremony space and effort to ensure I had all the over the counter asprin a girl might need to get through the day was above and beyond the call of duty.

Robina, your unwavering support is everything a person could ever need. Thank you.

Photography in this post courtesy of Abby Shepard Photography.

Follow us on Instagram to see behind the scenes clips of our weddings!

Connect with us to plan your next event!

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Local legend Bow Thayer played acoustically while sweet and savory culinary guests, The Skinny Pancake Upper Valley and Dumps A Go Go, whipped up delectable treats and served excellent local beers. The Barn on Gobeille Farms was in full form as the structure glowed from within while outside, the evenings bonfire pit quietly smoldered. Sounds of clamoring guests hummed harmoniously with the clinking of beer glasses and strumming guitar chords.

The Barn on Gobeille Farms is the area’s new rustic wedding venue. The property boasts a brand new post and beam barn set abreast the highest point of the family farm land overlooking the Vermont hilltops. On a clear day, you can even seen Mount Mansfield, the tallest peak in the state. Patrick and Meghan Gobeille built the barn for their own wedding in 2015, knowing they aspired to host many more celebrations on the family’s property one day. Patrick Gobeille’s parents even renovated the 200 year old farm house which rests aside the private apple orchard. This home is available to bridal parties to rent for the weekend. Adorned with a babbling brook outside, two stone patios, lush gardens, spacious yet cozy bedrooms and a chef’s kitchen, you won’t want to stay anywhere else on the weekend of your wedding day!

The barn itself includes a built in bar complete with ice bin and beer taps. An upstairs loft and lounge provides a comforting space for guests to converse, or a photographer to capture the first dance from the highest angle. Outside you’ll find the bonfire pit, outdoor patio and lawn games. The barn comes with all of the tables, linens, and table settings one would need and even some decor.

As beautiful as The Barn on Gobeille Farm’s is, the music night did more than highlight the area’s new wedding venue. All proceeds from the event supported the Hartford Technical and Career Center’s Snack Program. Hungry students struggle to learn. So, HTCC’s Snack Program provides snacks and lunches for students who need it most. This program hits close to home for me personally. I can recall many days when I sent my children to pre-school with lunches comprised from items we collected from the food shelf, while I purely survived on granola bars and coffee. Coffee is a hunger suppressant but not a meal. When I look back at the photos of us during that time it makes me sad to see how delicate I had become. It is because of this experience that giving back is at the foundation of Kay Mae Designs. I am so grateful to be in a place where I can design events like these and support programs like HTCC’s.

I look forward to creating many more beautiful events at The Barn on Gobeille Farms! Be on the look out for next year’s line up of music nights.

Looking to create your own sustainable event? Connect with us.

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Engaged!

Congratulations! You’ve announced it to all of your friends, family, and co-workers. You’ve whipped out that box you made when you were 12 with all the magazine clippings for inspiration, long before Pinterest was a thing. You have gone pin crazy for your “Mawwwige” boards on Pinterest. Your partner and you have been dreaming up all of the cute but personalized details for the wedding or honeymoon.

Enter the Overwhelm and Dread

Excitement for the day you say “I do” still lingers, but the massive undertaking planning an event of this size has set in. Where do you find the perfect vendors? What’s needed for a tent wedding? How does decor get sourced? Timelines, transportation, payment schedules, power requirements… all of these things are not the glamour you envisioned and you do not know where to start. You’re engaged, working full time, living a full life, and now an event planner too? No worries! Here’s a simple guide to help you along the way.

Step One

Chill out. Yes, I said it. Chill out! When I speak to brides, grooms, partners, etc. in our initial phone consultation a heavy worry has set in. As we talk further, I am able to see there’s so much work they have already done. Just knowing what you’d like, or the general direction, is a large chunk of the work! I can confidently say you’ve done more than you think you have, so chill out.

Step Two

I always advise my clients to first identify their priorities. Is a great honeymoon important to you? Does food and music matter most to you? Could you care less about decor, but need the entertainment for guests to be out of this world? Make a list of all the elements you’ll have at your wedding, and label these 1 through 10. Most times, just through conversation with a client, your wedding planner can identify these for you. If you’re the DIY bride, you’ll want to know this up front.

Step Three

Know your budget. Discuss with family members who may be contributing to the costs what their investments will be up front. Chat with your spouse about the reality of your wedding budget. Once you know your total budget, refer to a pie chart like this one to allocate funds appropriately while keeping your priorities in mind.

Step Four

Start with the big items first. Your venue, music, caterer, and photographers should be contacted 24 to 18 months ahead of time. These folks book up quickly in the peak wedding season, so jump on it. Next, contact a florist or devise a strategy for florals. Some choose a floral designer, and some choose a Pick-Your-Own route. My favorite Wedding Wire Award winning PYO farm is Cedar Circle Farm, in Thetford, Vermont.

Step Five

Fabulous, now that your location, food, music, pictures, and flowers are done you can turn your focus to hiring an officiant. Remember, if you are a part of an organized religion and would like your priest/pastor/head/etc. to tie you together in matrimony the church may have their own set of steps you must consider first. Talk with your leader to know what these are, so you can begin incorporating these into your timeline. Not religious? Find a Justice of the Peace to manage your ceremony! These folks will be registered with your town and state, a quick Google search will help you discover them.

Step Six

Secure decor. Rentals are highly recommended! Companies like Vermont Tent Company, Under Cover Tents, or Taylor Ann Rentals provide a comprehensive list of flatware, dishes, and all the tablescape items one could need. For the DIY savvy bride, you may wish to find all of these items ahead of time through warehouse sales, yard sales, or clearance shelves. I do not recommend this! The headache that comes from now handling storing, transportation, set up, break down, and what to do with it all afterwards is not worth the headache and extra work. Not to mention, the possibility nothing will match!

Step Seven

Discuss execution with your partner. It is beyond difficult to both coordinate your day, and enjoy it at the same time. I do not know how many last minute Day Of Coordination books have happened in every wedding planner’s lifetime, but we have all heard the panicked phone calls from a future spouse who is concerned with juggling it all. No one wants to show up to hair and make up frazzled because you spent the last three hours setting tables. Your day should be enjoyed, not working you to the bone! Hire your Day of Coordinator, or employ close family friends outside the wedding party to make it all happen.

More steps to come

This is a basic list of steps to take to manage that overwhelm. We all know there’s so much more to handling every detail than what’s listed here. Managing your timelines, making sure everyone knows where to be, that guests know where to be, handling the emergency vendor situations, ordering the invites and signs, the cake… all of it needs to be done. It’s why your wedding pro’s are prepared to help you. We want you to enjoy your beautiful day to the fullest without the stress and worry. We’ve got your back.

Need more help?

Let’s connect, shoot me an email with your questions. As a wedding pro, I love to share my expertise. Follow me on IG for inspiration and introductions to my favorite wedding professionals.

You’re engaged! Let it stay joyful, let us take on the management of an event.

Chat soon, xx

Kayce Mae

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The Message

What I want to share with you all is the message I worked hard to refine for my fellow graduates that day:

“Our achievements of tomorrow are the sum of our actions today. Success is not an accident. it is the result of daily hard work towards a set goal. When we were six, we knew we could do anything. Let today, serve as evidence.”

Kayce Mae Penn, CCV graduation 2019

Community College of Vermont has an incredibly diverse student body. Many, like myself, were single parents working double time to make this achievement happen. All of us graduates, knew the value of obtaining a degree, honing our skills through higher education, and ruthlessly pursued our dreams. CCV Graduation 2019 was one for the books as persevering and patient students of all kinds were rewarded for their dedication that day.

Feeling Behind

However, it’s been hard to shake a feeling that I am so behind. That’s what I truly want to talk to you all about today – the thief of our joy – comparison.

In my life, I had my first conversation about college and careers with my father at six years old. We were riding around in his old truck, running from one job site to the next. My dad, a master carpenter of many years, understood the value of education and hard work. He was the first one to tell me that I can do anything I want so long as I have a plan. But boy, by 19 did my plans change with the arrival of my first daughter and again at 20 with the arrival of my second daughter.

Determined to become the best version of myself for all three of us, I continued to reach for the degree, job skills and career I always wanted. By the time I was 25, I was helping small business implement software and protocol to help better run their operations. I supported us on my own. In the mean time, I went to school online and at night. There were times I struggled, working two jobs to pay the rent. There were times when I would run to the food shelf on my short thirty minute lunch break at a minimum wage job just to provide for us. But, I stayed the course, and knew as long as I had plan I could do anything I wanted to achieve.

As my career pivots came and my education continued, I learned more about who I am as a person. It was through my journey as a single mother and my experience of working and going to school simultaneously, that taught me I have the heart for design and a mind for business. Today, I am a brand expert and events producer. I stand here with an Associates degree in hand, two thriving little girls going into the second and third grades, and a successful charitable business.

Achievements

CCV graduation 2019 brought joy as my two girls watched me speak, and receive that degree. An example I rest assured will benefit them throughout their entire lives.

But it also brought on the struggle of comparing myself to my peers. Peers that I believed may have a masters by now, a more successful career by now, and all the other things supposedly – a house, a healthy marriage, two cars…{insert crazy assumptions here}.

This habit of comparing myself to my imaginary perception of others was brief and fleeting, but it’s important to talk about. We are all on our journey to our best selves, and there is no timeline or due date for it. There are no expectations of us except for those expectations we place on ourselves. Our achievements are not diminished by our age, race, status, gender, sexual orientation or any other label. Our achievements are ours, and are to be treasured no matter your place in this world.

The youngest to receive a degree at CCV graduation 2019 was 17, and the oldest was 76. Over 500 students received their degree that day. No one student’s accomplishment is to be diminished by the label of age or circumstance.

If you’re out there, and feeling like I did after CCV graduation 2019 please know this: you are successful. You are not behind. Do not allow comparison to be the thief of your joy. Your accomplishments are as valuable now, as they would be at any other time in your life.

Remember, your achievements of tomorrow are the sum of your actions today. All of those achievements are to be valued, no matter how old you are when you get there or who may have what beside you. Your achievements count, no matter what.

Now,

I look forward to working with my brides as a knowledgeable consultant. I look forward to working alongside companies as a brand expert, helping them craft their message and put it into the world. I look forward to helping women like me, the planet, and our communities.

Stop comparing yourself to the imaginary tales you create in your head, and start celebrating your accomplishments.

CCV Graduation 2019 was a dream come true for me. The six year old in me, who knew we could do anything as long as there’s a plan, is happy about that.

Chat soon, xo

Want to learn more? Follow on Instagram, or hop over to the blog!

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Thetford Center, Vermont May 4th 2019

On Saturday, May 4th, 2019 we held our first annual Green Up Day Festival on the Thetford Center Green in the heart of Thetford Village, Vermont.

Over 200 people attended the event to participate in celebrating the mission of Green Up Day.

Families relaxed on the green space underneath the season’s first true warm Spring day with cold beers and fresh tacos prepared by TRAILBREAK taps + tacos. Children raced across the open field reveling in the freedom, playing frisbee, dancing, listening to Storytime presented by Latham Library, and creating underneath arts tent with Little Feet Children’s Center. Live music filled the air entertaining people of all ages. Performances by Chris Powers and Bow Thayer were more than phenomenal, bringing big stage presence to an intimate venue. Each Thetford school from pre-k to high-school was represented by student artwork, found in a cascading display alongside the green. This traditional Vermont family-oriented event was successfully enjoyed by all, with many requests for a repeat in 2020.

Inspiration for this event

came on a short car ride home on a cold winter evening. As a native to the Upper Valley, I have lived here for well over twenty years. I have also lived in parts of Vermont like Burlington, and places like Raleigh, North Carolina. A strong urge to leave the Upper Valley and rejoin those cities stems from a huge frustration with the lack of free community-oriented events and access to things like them. I knew on that car ride home when the idea came to mind, it was crucial that I stop waiting for the small town I resided in to become what I wished for and started making it happen instead.

Why This Was Important

As a young mother living in cities like Burlington, free community events and gatherings were crucial to my mental health. As an extroverted person with young children, orienting yourself to a new neighborhood can be difficult. Events like Kids Day, story times at the library, music lessons, and mom’s groups made developing friendships and community possible. Without these opportunities to meet mothers or people like myself, I would have felt isolated and alone. Three years later upon my return to my childhood home, that’s exactly what happened. Lack of opportunity to meet new people or even bring my children to affordable entertainment made living here both arduous and lonely. In addition to the community mindset, I found it critical to illustrate the many ways an event can be sustainable.

I chose Green Up Day Festival as the first community event I would develop because it demonstrated the three principles I live my life and operate my business on – sustainability, community, and charity.

Sustainability

Our 200 person event utilized products by Bio-Bags USA, trash and compost bags that are 100% compostable. This event was created using 100% compostable cups, and TRAILBREAK taps + tacos served their food with 100% compostable napkins and utensils. We concluded the event with less than a half pound of true trash, making 99% of the event’s waste RECYCLABLE or COMPOSTABLE!

Community

Our Green Up Day Festival was created with the community as a priority. Only local vendors were utilized to execute the event, from food to music to yoga to art. Yoga was hosted by local instructor Katie Cawley from Untitled Wellness and Jill Ann Cray. Storytime was hosted by the Thetford Latham Library. Food served by TRAILBREAK taps + tacos, a restaurant with a traveling food truck only 20 miles away. Music was produced by local artists Chris Powers and Bow Thayer. Artwork presented that day came from each Thetford School. Activities underneath the art tent were hosted by a local preschool, Little Feet Children’s Center. The entire event produced by Kay Mae Designs, with entertainment for individuals of all ages in mind. There was something there for everyone, produced by everyone in or nearby the town. A true community event.

Charity

Green Up Day Festival was supported by the charitable giving of local vendors like Casella Waste Management, K + R portable toilets, Power’s Song and Sound, Bow Thayer, Untitled Wellness, Watson’s Garage, Hannafords, Bees Wrap, and of course Kay Mae Designs. Typical Kay Mae Designs events support a charity of the client’s choosing, but in this case, it was the community who supported a common cause for the betterment of all. Together we provided an afternoon of comradery while exemplifying sustainable efforts. That’s the goal of Kay Mae Designs, to make the world a better place one event at a time.

Purpose

Watching a single mom attend with her two boys to play with the giant Connect 4 games we had created just for this event was the exact reward I needed for all of the hard work put forth to produce this event. I watched as she relaxed with fresh food on the grass and listened to the hum of live music. Her children quickly forged new friendships and entertained themselves with the many activities provided for them. A sweet, rare break for a hardworking parent. The relief in this small moment is a feeling I know all too well myself. Individuals and families are the units that make up our communities. When we care for them, we’re caring for the health of our entire community. That’s why Kay Mae Design’s produces these events. That’s why this type of work is important to us all.

Gallery

Be on the lookout for the next community event produced by Kay Mae Designs! Have an idea in mind or an event of your own? Connect with us here or follow us on Instagram!

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Helicopter Mom is the one hovering around her children tending to their every whim, want or need. The one is secretly stressed out, but continues to hover anyways for fear of letting go, judgement, or criticism.

I have a confession.

I am not a helicopter mom.

In fact, I do not enjoy playing make believe, tag, house or any other game.

Also, between you and I, sometimes…I even let my children out of my sight.

GASP!

Insert outcries of rage, safety concerns, reasons it isn’t like the old days and mom shaming here.

Now that we have that out of the way, listen to me.

My children are very familiar with the rules and boundaries of these places:

1. Our yard
2. Local playground
3. The Montshire Museum
4. Our grocery store

These are places I let my children participate like normal humans free from my immediate grasp. 

I spend a lot of conversations with my children talking about safe adults, how to communicate with me about where they are and what they intend to do, and reasonable expectations. 

Not A Helicopter Mom Means:

I am not a helicopter mom. This means when we are on the playground I am not next to my eight year old pushing her on the swing anymore, because I want her to practice caring for herself. I am not playing tag with them because I despise that game. I am watching them from afar, most likely taking pictures, and admiring the way they can do the monkey bars when just last fall the could not. It means when they are having a disagreement with another playmate, I do not step in right away to solve it for them. I let them have a voice and practice what I’ve preached many times before.

I am not a helicopter mom. This means when we are at the Montshire childrens museum I am posted nearby photographing them or simply on a bench observing the way the find this one exhibit is interesting today when just last weekend they hadn’t even glanced at it. I am not explaining how to interact with the other children or how to play with this exhibit. It means they are responsible for telling me if they are moving to a new floor or space.

I am not a helicopter mom. This means when we’re at our local grocery store that they are being sent to the next aisle to grab toilet paper or milk. It means they are being trusted to use walking feet and manners without me watching them. It means using their discernment when approaching people or situations they don’t know. So when an older woman dropped a gallon of milk on the floor watching it explode, my daughter went to grab the nearest employee to help clean it up. She was proud of knowing what to do. She came back to me beaming. It means I am not stressing for an hour trying to fill my cart and entertain two cart bound children, or stuffing a screen in their face so I can get a chore done.

I am not a helicopter mom. It means when we’re at the library they know where the boundaries are. They explore games or books freely, working together to read new words. It means I am writing a research paper or studying new sustainability practices while they operate in the defined space on their own.

I am not a helicopter mom. It means I am not afraid to let my children play outside in our yard by themselves. If someone gets hurt, they know how to come find me. 

I am not a helicopter mom, and its hard sometimes. Over the weekend we hit the mountain for a little snow tubing. Originally I had planned on each child riding a tube down the mountain with an adult. However, mountain policy requires children over 8 and over 48 inches to ride alone. We taught them how to steer and use the brakes. I was so nervous to let them go. I had to trust them. It was so difficult not to hover in this case. To my pleasant surprise they glided down that mountain like pros and even managed to ride the short lift to the top together alone. My children were glowing after an hours worth of tubing. I was stress free, happy, and learned a little more about who they are as people.

Why I Stopped Hovering

I adopted this method two years ago when my stress was through the roof, I could not bare the weight of expectations set before me as a mother. Because of this, I constantly felt like if I wasn’t near them participating in their every activity I was a bad mom. Feeling this way also made me angry, anxious and miserable. Simply because I couldn’t enjoy playing tag or building at the Montshire. Simply because I inundated myself with menial parenting tasks and assigned a great value to them. Silly isn’t it?

Here’s what happened when I let go of that expectation for myself: I was happy.

More importantly, my children were happy. In fact, my oldest daughter was able to dictate that she felt trusted. I watched them become confident in trusting themselves and their gut. They could come to me with pride when they knew how to help someone at the grocery store. They’re learning what it means to be safe. Our quality time became sharing with them things I love like photography, and in turn they’re learning who I am as a mother. Adopting this practice has helped me to realize how much they can do on their own without me. And as a result, our relationships have become stronger. In fact, my spouse is thankful for the change, too.

Truth is these little birds will be on their own one day and I need them to know what boundaries are, who safe people are, and that their gut instincts are right. I want to define and hone these skills in them before I am no longer able to hover around them. We do not need to stress ourselves out coddling our kids, we need to teach them. I do not need to be burdened with unrealistic expectations of motherhood, and my kids don’t need me stressed out.

Hello wise parenting, goodbye helicopter mom.  

Need to be less stressed about your child’s next birthday party? Send me an email, let’s chat. Lets Create Together.

© Kayce Mae Penn and kaymaedesign.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Kayce Mae Penn and kaymaedesign.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. All photos are original works by Kayce Mae Penn and subject to copyright